Paula Dean & Ham in the Face

This video of Paula Dean getting hit in the face with a ham cannot be any funnier! I have nothing against Paula Dean, and love that she was able to laugh it off like a true professional.

Paula, maybe that ham was getting its revenge!

I heart Tony Gonzales

It's really important for fellow football players to support PETA's initiatives. I love that Tony Gonzales is sticking it to Vick and other animal abusers by using his celebrity to bring attention to the atrocities of wearing fur. Go Tony! I'll root for you any day.

https://secure.peta.org/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=2575
While you are at it, sign the anti-fur petition, and you'll never wear fur again.

kanye

If I were to propose to boycott Kanye West after his incredibly stupid outburst on the VMA's the other evening, it would not affect my life at all. Kanye has always been a no-talent hack with songs for school kids. I always think of him as the new Diddy, someone who rips off samples and makes millions off of other peoples' talent. I also partially credit him with the demise of hip-hop, and I vow to spend part of my day listening to old Nas albums just to relish in decent hip hop that doesn't infect the airwaves. Besides being a major jerk, Kanye wears clown clothes and starts ridiculous trends, acts like an ass 9 out of ten times and oh yeah, he makes pretty young girls cry.
If I had kids, I would not let my children listen to his junky music and they would be much better off because of it. Lots of us tuned in to award shows in the late 80's and 90's looking for bad outfits and off-color remarks during acceptance speeches, but this was taking it a little too far. Perhaps he was trying to out-shine Lady Gaga, and in some respects he did, but not in a good way. Kanye, stay off the airwaves, stop making music and go hide in a cave until you learn to act like a man, because all you've proved over the last 5 years is you are nothing but a big, ugly baby.

Beyonce deserves major props for being such a classy lady, passing the torch to a new young person who is deserving of the awards that the people voted for.

Wanna be startin' something

Today I stepped in a big, juicy wad of gum, sitting in the blazing hot sun on the sidewalk where I picked up a City Paper to use as padding for a package I was about to send. "Bleeping Bleep!" I yelled, angry, fuming for the next thirty minutes as I could feel my shoe stick ever-so-slightly to the sidewalk below. In line at the post-office I could faintly smell sweat mingled with peppermint chewing gum. "Bleep!"
When I stepped into the office my co-worker told me, "Farrah Fawcett is dead." Heartbroken, I mused, "I guess stepping in gum isn't so bad."
Later, at my other job, my friend was looking at a blog that said Michael Jackson was dead. No Way! I said, but sure enough he's gone too. Walking home I saw a candlelit vigil in Rittenhouse Park, and I was wondering if it was for Farrah, Neda, or Michael Jackson.
I still have that gum stuck to my shoe.

'Sup Republicans?

What is going on with Republicans and infidelity? That Senator in the gay bathroom incident, that Senator from Nevada last week and today that guy from South Carolina. Seriously there's a trend and I'm kind of enjoying the show...play on boys!

All about the 80's

I'm all about the 80's and 90's house music lately. Can't get enough. I'm not embarrassed about it either. Last night I downloaded Crystal Water's Gypsy Woman (She's Homeless) and cannot stop listening to it. Ce Ce Peniston, KLF and Black Box are making a comeback, and I am totally digging it.
Another very 80's thing I'm obsessed with is neon, so I was more-than pleased when I opened the new Victoria's Secret catalog and saw neon tank tops. I snagged one in day-glow yellow. They make dresses and tops too! Warning: don't wear if you are trying to lay low.
Also really into Roseanne re-runs.

One thing that isn't cool and please God don't let it catch on: Neon scrunchies from American Apparel. Not cool. Scrunchies were never cool. I want to say "Run for the Hills", but in the hills they are still wearing the original scrunchie. I fear this scrunchie implosion as much as Uggs.
Say no to the scrunchie!

Nutrition tips from a beached whale

This morning on Rachel Ray, beached whale Winona Judd gives nutrition tips. I'm sorry, but if someone with two chins is giving you tips on how to eat healty, run, as fast as you can, to the nearest salad bar.

exlusive:word usage

Exclusive: a piece of news, or the reporting of a piece of news, obtained by a newspaper or other news organization, along with the privilege of using it first.

All day long I hear on the news, "join us for our exclusive interview with ________ tomorrow evening". The thing is, every network says the same thing. Rachel Maddow made fun of herself last week, saying she had an exclusive interview with Rod Blagoyevich, adding, the she was the only person on her network at that time slot to host the interview, making light of the fact that there wasn't a soul he wasn't willing to talk with. What I'm getting at is, the word exclusive prompts me to wonder if this term isn't overused. Katie Couric is hosting an exclusive interview with the pilot that landed in the Hudson weeks ago, but wait, wasn't Larry King the first person to interview him, like over two weeks ago? Please clarify, oh holy media.

What's with this exclusivity. Networks want you to think they have the only word, even though it has already been broadcast all over the place all week. I'm not challenging the media or anything, I just wish they'd stop exploiting the English language for their express purposes.

Coincidence? I think not.

This week, three major networks unveiled a similar type of comedy-news, each anchored by a prominent black comedian. Last week, if you recall, our country's first black president was also elected.
Was the media aware that Obama was to become our next president, or were they taking a gamble. Is making fun of black people more acceptable when a black person does it? Because, judging on what I've seen so far, that is exactly where they are taking this. Sometimes I really, truly believe that it is the media that runs this country.
CNN has the very un-funny D.L. Hughley anchoring, D.L. Hughley Breaks the News, and Bill Bellamy has a new show on BET. But the creme de la creme lies with the very talented David Alan Grier's new show Chocolate News.
I tried to watch DL Hughley last night, but it's a snoozer. He's never been very funny and I'm not sure what CNN is trying to do by hiring a half-rate comic to anchor a comedy show on a news channel. Perhaps they want a piece of the John Stewart pie. The only thing that kept me riveted to Hughley's show for the ten minutes I could last, was looking at his train-wreck of a face. DL Hugley has gotten some major face-work and has ended up looking like a cross between Diana Ross and a billy goat. You can plainly see the eye-tuck, the cheek implants and the botoxed forehead, so if you like looking at future disasters then this could be a very interesting show for you.
I probably won't give Bill Bellamy the time of day. I never watched any of those Rush Hour movies and don't think I would even get most of his references.
But David Alan Grier! I've been waiting for him to come out with his own show since the days of Living Color and finally it's has arrived. David Alan Grier's skits are so wrong they're right and I cannot tell you how hard I laughed during his latest post-election show. Highly recommended.
So that sums up the weekly review of all the recent 'news-comedy' shows that have emerged with the new president. Even if Barack doesn't take this country in a new direction, at least the media is attempting to do their part.

The Flight of the salmon

Attempting to leave town on Friday, the day of the Phillies parade, was much like a salmon swimming upstream, against the current. I felt I was battling ages and ages of tradition and at one point thought it would be easier just to join the revelling masses. However, much like a determined salmon, I got the hell out of Philadelphia, and after viewing the sea of Ugg-clad girls in sweatpants and Phillies gear with their drunkard loser boyfriends I couldn't have been happier with my decision to head upstream.
When they won the World Series, I was in my living room, alone, surrounded by the yelps of a million fans. Minutes later, Broad Street was flooded with hundreds of thousands of ignorant fans, looting stores and toppling shrubbery. Why the destruction, Philly fans? Is this the way you show love for your city and your team. I've never understood this whole sports thing. Why does one think that some guy who was not born in Philadelphia and is making millions more per year than most do in a lifetime, is doing this for them? But what I really don't understand is why they had to topple and uproot my favorite statue in the city, the man with the umbrella, and why they felt the need to loot businesses.
I'm not on board with this whole revelry, this spirit of destruction. But if there is one thing that will make the world notice Philadelphia, I guess this was it. Thanks a lot. The Phillies team may be world champions, but its fans are a whole bunch of losers.

Is she or isn't she?

As my partner cozied up in bed late last night, he whispered in my ear, "Jennifer Aniston is pregnant with John Mayer's baby!" My dreams were filled with thoughts of espionage and when I awoke the question still remained. Is Jennifer Ansiston finally going to be a mom? I trolled the scroll on CNN while watching the morning news, and searched People's daily headlines, but to no avail. Sure I found some unreliable sources that claimed it as fact, but until E news or People tells me so the question still remains: Is she or isn't she?

Karl the Teddy Bear

My fashion roots don't run as deep as they did a year or two ago, but that doesn't stop me hearing the latest news about Karl Lagerfeld. If you know me well, you know that he gives me the creeps. Steiff, A German teddy bear company has released a limited-edition Karl Lagerfeld teddy bear running oh, a measly 1500 dollars. Have you hugged your freaky-looking Karl Lagerfeld teddy bear today? Do I want one? you bet.
What's next, a Michael Jackson bear? Liz Taylor? Let's make Teddy Bears out of all the freaks of the fashion world.

tooting my own horn

Tonight on the Green Network, Miley Cyrus was talking about her "eco-friendly lyrics" to her new song!? I mean, I guess it's cool that she's influencing all these young teeny-boppers to be environmentally conscious and all, but the girl works for Disney! I told you the Green Network was lame.
Eco living is quickly becoming a really crazy insane trend that is catching on like rapid fire, which is great but we know how trends go. People turn their backs on it, they move on, the trend fades to ridicule. Which is what I wish would happen to Miley Cyrus.

Vegan shoes for classy gals

Natalie Portman was on Project Runway as a guest judge to pump up her new upscale vegan shoe line. Follow the link here.
Just today yet another pair of cheap vegan shoes I recently purchased fell to pieces and reinforced my need for some quality shoes.
Thanks Natalie!

The new Green channel and why it irks me

The new Green Channel on cable TV launched about a month ago ...have you seen it? In theory, its a great concept. People showcasing their green products, builders explaining how to better your home, celebrities showing you how to be green. Entourage star, Adrien Grenier has his own show, "Alter Eco", where he pals around with a bunch of hip LAsters, showing products in local eco-stores, meeting local gardeners who can tell you how to build a compost in your backyard, all while having a hip cool approach to life that only celebrity can bring. yawn... Bored yet?
My favorite cookbook author, Rene Loux has her own show, where she consults with other hip celebrities and tells them how to be green. I love her cookbooks and recommend them whole-heartedly but OMG if I hear the word "green" one more time from her lips I might hurt someone. On a particularly recent episode Rene meets up with her "friend" Alice Cooper and tells him how he can be green on the golf course. First of all, I really don't buy into their artificial friendship and secondly, isn't being green and golfing polar opposites? Aren't golf courses artificial green spaces where once thrived natural wildlife habitats which have been torn down and turned into luxury golf courses where mostly rich, wealthy people waste much of their time? I recommend the John Sayles film, Sunshine State, for those unaware of this fact. So, what did she tell him? "Wear bamboo or organic cotton, use these golf-tees made out of corn, use these recycled golf balls. Well, some of her advice is nice,. I mean bamboo fabric is awesome, but all in all golfing tears down eco-cultures, destroys communities and displaces wildlife, all which we need if we are going to continue life on earth. So take that for some honest advice, Alice. Lastly, a vegan like Rene should at least sneak in a few words about snacks on the golf course and pump up her books!
The Ed Bagley show, "Living with Ed" is the saving grace of the Green Channel. Ed Bagely has been doing his own thing for years, installing solar panels on his roof long before it was chic, riding his bike in LA where everyone opts for a hybrid instead of using their own two legs. He's the real pioneer, the others are just marketing goods. Oh and did I mention that Emeril Lagasse has his own show? Ugh serioulsy, a carnivorous meat eater telling me how to be green. puh-leeese.

Gwyneth Relates

Remember a few years ago when Gwyneth Paltrow came out and openly admitted she was macrobiotic? (ahh the horrors!) Remember when she had the Chinese Cupping all down her back with an-open backed dress? (I've done it, it's awesome and I can totally understand why she wanted to show that off, that's a lot of stagnation!)
Well, Gwyneth has long been viewed as kind of an enigma in Hollywood, she's a bit quirky a bit off, kind of new age, experimental and eats weird stuff. Well, not anymore, Gwyneth has returned to eating fish and dairy and admits she has unhealthy vices. Read the article here: http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20200197,00.html?xid=rss-topheadlines
I'm kind of disappointed. I can take or leave most of her movies, though I liked Sliding Doors and Sylvia, she really stood out as someone in Hollywood that didn't give a shit, someone I could relate to, not that I'd given it much thought beyond today, someone kind of in tune with herself. I think it's because she had kids. Kids change people, they tend to eat more sugar and more junk food, in general, I mean I don't have statistics to back it up, but it's a well-founded theory based on the vast array of parents I've come to know over the years. A dietary observation, if you will.
Anyway Gwyneth shows off that she's normal, kind of, in this article and I'm really disappointed that she eats dairy.

word usage

I can't stand it when "yummy" is used to describe anything other than food.
As in, "...featuring Spring's yummiest shoes." Or, "Doesn't she just look delicious?"
I, for one, do not find most peoples' leather shoes, grubbby sneakers, or any other shoe, to be "yummy." Is it just me?

Another over-used word or phrase I hear far too often recently: Preggers. "She's preggers you know.."
I solemnly swear I'll never use that term unless I'm joking or making fun of it.

social tagging, abbreviations and identity

Today I saw two MGB's walking down the street.

Let's break it down: M= Male G=Gay B=Blipster.

What is a Blipster? A blipster is a black hipster. I did not make this up; last year the New York Times published an article on blipsters in Brooklyn.

I used to think that hipsters were fashionable artists, but the term has evolved to encompass all that is trendy today, now.
Once upon a time, hipsters shopped at thrift stores and played used guitars in moldy basements, but now they just prance around wearing $200 jeans and a brand-new a la mode $100 scarf that will be so out by Fall.
Every city will be experience their version of the hipster implosion in the coming year(s), if not already. It's another fashion trend that already ended. Enough already!

What Paula said

The other night on American Idol, Paula said, "Oh, I just want to squeeze you until your head pops off and then eat it."

Whhaaaaatttt?

overheard on walnut street

I love to eaves-drop, there's no denying that. My bf gets so annoyed with me when I laugh incredulously for no apparent reason while all along I'm listening to the people behind me. "Did you hear that?"....
here's some gems I picked up this week:
Walnut Street, an unassuming couple pushing a baby carriage, "I don't think he's into the whole mushroom-trippy thing".

Walnut St, a woman in her 20's, unassuming, kind of frumpy, " ...then all these drag queens came out and gave me a lap-dance. They gave me cake, it was crazy..."